HERA'S DILEMMA

Hera’s dilemma… Wandering eyes are coveting eyes. I wish I could blind them all. Behind my kind quiet smile rages a maenad with the wildest of urges to stab the very faces of those who salivate like hungry bitches for that which is mine. Damn my silly ache to be seen. My disease is, I only have eyes for you. I am a jealous Queen when it comes to my love for you. Your charisma is my poison for you can charm even the foulest of enemies and lull a raging heart to sleep with your guile and your wit. I become undone at the thought that I will always be left behind. It seems your rhythms and songs have no room for a duet and I am condemned to be the moon as you are to be exalted like the sun. In the shadows my pride wrestles with a tidal wave of tears burning like acid trying to escape but I allow them no concessions as the pain is hidden by the most insincere smile that still is warm enough to warm those around me and those that fawn over you. No one suspects the curses I throw upon their heads like the thunderbolts you used to undermine the Titans themselves. You look at me and smile and my heart leaps to grasp that smile as validation of your affections and that though you are seduced by the adulations and adorations of those around you, I make myself believe that you do love me or care for me and it is then, at that exact moment, I almost break inside. I almost break inside because I see myself truly as I am. I am held captive by your majesty and spring to any scrap of affection or attention you fling my way. I become nauseated at the thought that somehow I have become your willing lap dog. My pride wills me up as the Queen I am and I make my escape to the doors of your temple to escape the festivities and your performances without looking back. As I am just out the door I feel your warm hands gently pull me back in, to you and I hear your whisper as your lips brush gently over my neck and ear “I have only eyes for you my love and though I may cavort and move about you are the one that I shall leave with and whom shall be forever mine.” Hidden tears stream down my face and my soul is assuaged and I again take my place in the shadows of your brilliant and festive light. Only to realize I am once again hidden and I began to ache a new, to be seen. I begin to ache for the light and wrestle with loyalty, love and pride. How I loathe the covetous eyes which molest your effigy. The effigy of my love. Wandering eyes are coveting eyes. I wish I could blind them all. Behind my kind quiet smile rages a maenad with the wildest of urges to stab the very faces of those who salivate like hungry bitches for that which is mine. Damn my silly ache to be seen.